Pack
leaders don’t project nervousness. They don’t
project panic. They don’t project tension.
What’s
the same about a dog, an elephant and a horse? These animals all
organize behind a leader.
People
make a mistake when they treat dogs like humans. Every species has its
own psychology. If we understand its psychology, we can control the
behavior, because we know how to relate to them.
Newborn
puppies need to find a place or status within the pack. They
don’t get a name like we do, because personality is something
humans create and only exists in our world. In the animal world, there
are two positions: the leader and the follower. Dogs are simple; we
make their lives complicated by misunderstanding what they need as a
species.
Dog
Speak Dogs communicate through constant energy. The pack leader always
projects a calm-assertive energy. Energy is what I call beingness: who
and what you are being at every moment. (If you don’t know
what I mean by calm-assertive energy, think about Oprah Winfrey. She is
calm and assertive in the human world.) Pack leaders don’t
project nervousness. They don’t project panic. They
don’t project tension.
Simply
put: the pack leader is a calm-assertive presence that provides balance
to the pack. It’s also not about gender; a female or a male
can become pack leader. Pack leaders control everything; nothing is
open to debate.
Two
Worlds Collide When dogs come into our homes, they meet emotional
energy for the first time. We shower them with affection, and they see
us as excited energy. This is why dogs don’t listen to
humans. Their mothers never acted this way. Where did the
calm-assertive leadership go?
We
often develop a different agenda for our dogs. We want to make puppies
our babies. When people see a nervous or shy dog, they console her like
they would another human.
In
the animal world, this nurtures instability, something a pack would
never do. From day one, the human fulfills himself and forgets about
what’s important to the dog.
In
the absence of a one hundred percent leader, the dog, even a submissive
one, will seek to fill what they see as a vacant role. The dog will
ignore the owner or act out in other ways. This is the beginning of
giving control to the dog.
One
of the most important things you can remember is that dogs are animals.
If we don’t fulfill them as a species, they won’t
live a balanced, centered life. Understanding and projecting a pack
leader’s calm-assertive energy will create a positive and
lasting connection with your dog.
Pack
Mentality Interaction Without Words
Dogs
do not speak using words; they interact through constant energy.
Dogs
do not speak using words; they interact through constant energy.
Barking is one way, but not the only way, dogs communicate.
Think
of a newborn puppy: First the nose starts to work; then the eyes; then
the ears. The nose is the most powerful thing they use to relate and
connect with their surroundings.
Humans
often rely on verbal communication when they interact with dogs:
“Come on, Johnny, please, please stop eating the
flowers!” The pack leader doesn’t negotiate or
cajole to get what she wants. No wonder the dog is ignoring you!
When
you meet a dog for the first time, share the same energy that they
would receive from their pack leader. This calm-assertive state will
let them understand who you are and really see you. Crouching down to
their level while smiling and cooing tells a dog absolutely nothing;
you might as well be speaking Martian.
The
dog will respond to your calm-assertive energy by balancing it with a
calm-submissive state. Once she achieves this state, you can share
affection and love.
Unspoken
Rules The mom or pack leader also uses calm-assertive energy to set
rules, boundaries and limitations for how the dog interacts with his
surroundings. The pack leader enforces these laws in a quiet way; maybe
the mom picks up the puppy if he strays outside the den.
The
pack leader doesn’t project emotional or nervous energy and
neither should you. If you don’t set rules, boundaries and
limitations in calm-assertive ways, your dog will not respect you.
Waiting
is another way that pack leaders assert their position. Puppies wait to
eat; dogs wait until the pack leader wants them to travel. Waiting is a
form of psychological work for the dog. Domestication means dogs
don’t need to hunt for food, but they can still work for
food.
Establish
your position as pack leader by asking your dog to work. Take him on a
walk before you feed him. And just as you don’t give
affection without your dog being in a calm-submissive state,
don’t give food until your dog acts calm and submissive.
(Exercise will help the dog, especially a high-energy one, to achieve
this state.)
Try
this: To further achieve a calm and submissive state before feeding,
ask your dog to sit and wait a moment while you place his meal in his
bowl. When he has sat patiently, give him the okay to eat.
Interact
as canine parents interact with their puppies. Begin your day with
calm-assertive energy before you share emotions or excitement.
Establish rules, limitations and boundaries to create a healthy state
of mind in the dog. Finally, enjoy a simple walk - a primal activity
for dogs accustomed to following pack leaders over hundreds of miles.
It will say more than any word ever could.
Pack
Mentality How to Claim Leadership Over the Pack
Dogs
don’t follow emotional leaders; they follow calm-assertive
leaders.
The
first step in assuming the role of pack leader is to understand dog
psychology. We must recognize dogs as animals and remember what is
important to them as a species.
Dogs
don’t know your name, your race or your achievements. You
could be the president of the United States; dogs don’t know.
What they do know is the energy you share and the activities you
participate in with them.
Dogs
don’t follow emotional or lovable leaders; they follow
calm-assertive leaders. The mother is calm and assertive when
she’s giving birth, and that’s the first energy
that they experience.
You
must project calm-assertive energy before you share love with your dog.
Love is a human gift; we’re the only pack leader who will
love them. Their canine pack leader won’t throw a birthday
party for them or reward good behavior.
Most
dogs that live in this country have shelter, food, and lots of love.
These are the dogs that often become unstable because they’re
not working for food and water. Dogs need a pack leader to feel
balanced and connected. They need to be told every day what to do.
Leadership
is forever, and love is forever. But sometimes we get lazy and only
share love and no leadership. Once you share calm-assertive energy and
the dog goes into a submissive state, then you can share love and
affection.
The
Rules Dogs also look to the pack leader to set rules, boundaries and
limitations. People often ask me at what age they should start training
their puppy. The answer is immediately!
The
dog’s mother begins training her puppies from birth. She
makes them wait for food; she controls when they play and how far they
travel. Adult dogs need these same rules, boundaries and limitations
from their pack leader.
Another
important necessity for dogs is the walk. In their natural habitat,
they earn food and water while traveling, and they get to experience
the world. Walking also stimulates their minds.
Position
matters; walking in front of a dog allows you to be seen as the pack
leader. Conversely, if your dog controls you on the walk,
he’s the pack leader. Master the walk, and your dog will
relate to you as a pack leader.
During
the walk, you will feel the highest level of connection with your dog.
My clients are often surprised by this, because they think dogs only
crave love and affection. This is not so. Dogs crave rules, boundaries
and limitations from their pack leader. This allows them to relax and
accept their role within the pack.
Pack
Mentality Teaching Humans to Relate to Their Dogs Without Words
The
key to earning your dog’s respect as the pack leader is to
understand the nature of the pack.
One
thing I have learned from dogs is to live in the moment. They
don’t live in the future or the past like humans do.
If
someone brings me a dog that has destroyed the living room, I
don’t see the dog as that action. I see her as a dog that
needs help. She didn’t premeditate the action.
This
doesn’t mean that dogs are less than humans or more than
humans. They’re just a different species. If we
don’t fulfill them as a species, dogs won’t live a
balanced, centered or happy life.
Dogs
as Animals Dogs don’t follow emotional leaders or lovable
leaders; they follow calm-assertive leaders. This is the same for all
animals in the animal kingdom. Humans are the only animals that follow
unstable, emotional leaders around the world.
The
pack leader, often the mom or a male, controls everything: when the
pack eats, when they play and how far they can walk. The key to earning
your dog’s respect as the pack leader is to understand the
nature of the pack and to duplicate the action and attitude of the pack
leader. The pack instinct is the dog’s strongest natural
motivator.
The
biggest mistake people make is seeing their dogs as humans or babies.
This allows them to miss out on what the dog needs as an animal. The
sad thing is people do this out of well-intentioned love, but what
they’re doing only nurtures unstable behavior and deprives
the dog of what he needs most: leadership.
Dogs
as Breeds A dog is an animal first and a breed second. For example,
people think all German Shepherds act a certain way. German Shepherd is
just the breed, like a cultural background in the dog world.
A
mutt can develop the same negative side effects as a German Shepherd.
Do not focus on the breed; instead, focus on the behavior. The breed is
just the skills or the outfit the dog wears. Underneath, they are all
just dogs.
Yes,
there are physical differences between breeds. A Siberian Husky can
travel for dozens of miles a day and is not suited to live in an urban
apartment. If you have a frustrated Siberian Husky, their physical
energy will only intensify unbalanced behavior.
This
is why it’s important to allow every dog the opportunity to
work out physical energy. Take her for a walk or bike ride every day to
exercise her body and her mind.
The
Submissive State Most dogs are born submissive because there can only
be so many pack leaders. When dogs become unstable, they exhibit
fearful, nervous or other unwanted behaviors. Our goal is to provide
the dog with the same calm-assertive leadership that they would
experience in a pack.
This
natural balance, calm-assertive leadership with calm-submissive
behavior, nurtures stability and creates a balanced, centered and happy
dog.
Pack
Mentality Nonverbal Signals Every Dog Owner Should Learn
When
your dog recognizes you as the pack leader, you will enjoy the
connection that you have sought all along.
Dogs
communicate first through their nose, then their eyes, and finally
their ears. Humans need to understand how the dog interacts on a primal
level with her pack leader in order to connect with their own dogs.
Project
calm-assertive energy. This is the key to connecting with your dog. The
mom or the pack leader always projects calm-assertive energy. Dogs in
the pack balance that energy with a calm- submissive way of being.
Humans
often project excited energy when they interact with their dogs. They
shower their dog with affection, which feels foreign to the dog.
Always
begin your day with calm-assertive energy before you share affection.
This fulfills your dog’s needs as an animal before your own.
Set
rules, boundaries and limitations. This is the hardest thing for people
to do. They even wait to introduce any rules or training until the
puppy is at least six months old!
The
dog’s mom sets these rules from day one: where they can
sleep, how far they can walk, and when they can eat. These rules,
boundaries and limitations nurture a healthy state of mind.
As
adults, dogs look to their pack leader to set these rules. They
don’t question the pack leader’s position, and the
pack leader doesn’t look to the dogs to affirm his position.
This is the natural balance of the pack.
Without
rules, boundaries and limitations, your dog will not respect you as the
pack leader.
Make
feeding a ritual. When puppies are little, they wait to be fed by their
mother. This waiting is a form of work. When feeding, we ask the pack
to work for food and water. This is why we walk the pack before they
eat.
Dogs
don’t get fed when their mind is excited, nervous, tense or
aggressive. They get fed when their mind is calm and submissive.
Walk
the walk. If we study dogs in their natural habitat, walking is how
they earn food and water and experience the world. Dogs would rather
walk than do anything else, because they get to work their body and
their mind.
A big
back yard is no substitute for a primal activity like a walk. A dog
with a big back yard can still develop frustration because the physical
energy needs to go somewhere. That is why daily walks are so important.
When
walking, make sure that you are in front of your dog. This allows you
to be seen as the pack leader. Remember, dogs always follow the pack
leader.
When
your dog recognizes you as the pack leader, you will enjoy the
connection that you have sought all along.
